Posts Tagged "aging"

Motivating Women…Part 3: New Attitude

Posted by Liz on Feb 17, 2012 in aging, appearance, exercise, Inspiration, women's health | 2 comments

If you haven’t caught this week’s posts, I’ve been talking to three powerhouse women: Shonali Burke, Kami Watson Huyse and Julie Pippert about the changes that they are making in their lives to improve their health. From the reaction these posts have garnered, I am convinced that my instincts were correct: their stories are nothing but motivating, not only to other women but also amongst themselves.

The sum of our parts

One overriding theme that arisen as this series has unfolded is that as women,  we are often as strong as the sum of our parts. Research has shown repeatedly that women thrive when they are supported by others. As I wrote several years ago ‘tending and befriending,’  nurturing our personal relationships,  communicating to one another when we need help, finding a shoulder to cry on or simply offering a hug not only reaffirms who we are but can also provide an essential foundation to see us through. The same goes for starting and maintaining a healthier routine: if you have a strong foundation, there’s no limit to what you can achieve.

To a certain extent, aging has given these women strength to take on new challenges and has acted a personal motivator to take back their health. “I am actually really enjoying my 40s,” says Shonali. “I feel much more ‘together’ than I did in my 30s and definitely in than in my 20s. I suppose as you age, you realize that life isn’t really worth anything unless you are satisfied that you gave it your all each day.” And as Julie notes, it’s not as easy as it once was to “coast in good health.” Rather, she expresses that, like many of her peers, the challenges have piled on and “it’s harder and harder to keep up good health and good feeling, as well as a trim and fit body.”  Moreover? The old adage ‘there’s no time like the present’ has certainly put its tendrils in these women’s psyches; Kami says that she knows that if she doesn’t “start now, I only get older from here.” This perspective is quite interesting because it does speak to the inside out; if you feel good about yourself, your outward glow certainly radiates a younger, healthier you.

A game plan

Your strategy for achieving personal wellness goals is just that: yours’. As noted, having a fitness ‘buddy’ or a personal trainer to lend support and push you to go the extra mile is optimal. So is journaling, says Julie. “I think it’s crucial to journal, at least during your initial phase of getting healthy, especially when it comes to eating right and being active. It’s a pain and not something I can maintain long-term, but each time I hit a plateau or start gaining [weight], I go back to journaling and see, oh yes, I am eating too much or too much of the wrong things and I’m not exercising enough. Or I’ve hit an exercise rut and it’s time to shake it up. Some people need a lot of shifting and I am one. You have to listen to your body. If you aren’t achieving your goal, it’s probably time to start journaling again and figuring out what you need to change.”

Give to yourself and they shall receive

As women, we don’t always adapt well to being on the receiving end. Mindful living, as I wrote about a year ago, is essential to our ability to care for others:

 How do we acknowledge that be cared for does not equate to losing power or control but actually improves outlook, wellbeing, and ability to deal with any challenges that we might be facing, that allowing others to “do” empowers and does not ‘de-power?’ Is it fear of refusal? Or fear of letting go?

Importantly, being cared for also refers to being cared for by ourselves. That means incorporating healthier habits that will add that extra armor we need as we age. As Kami says, “it is so easy for us to put everything and everyone else first and forget that by taking care of ourselves we actually are doing everyone a favor,” adding that “as a mother and a spouse, when I am less stressed out and taking care of my health and wellbeing it is a much better environment in my home.”

When was the last time you stepped back and really stopped to take stock? “Women spend so much time looking after/worrying about others that they don’t take enough care of themselves,” says Shonali. “We need to nurture ourselves first; only then will we be strong and capable enough to do this for others.” She adds an interesting point of view about taking time, that it’s not selfish. “We need to take a second look at the word ‘selfish'” explains Shonali. “It’s not selfish to be well. It’s not selfish to give yourself personal time and space. It’s not selfish to make your own health a priority. In fact, it’s the best kind of selflessness, because only then can we truly and wholly care for others.”

If you are still on fence about diving into a new routine, just try. Be present, engage in the moment. Start slowly and build up. You don’t need to run a marathon the first time you step out in your new sneakers. And you don’t have anything to prove. However, also? Don’t lose sight of the joy and fun as you move through your goals: the humorist Josh Billings said it best:

“There’s lots of people who spend so much time watching their health, they haven’t got time to enjoy it.”

Motivating women. There are three in my immediate horizon and thousands more around me. And you? Take some time and look around. I bet you’ll be glad that you did!

Motivating Women…Part 1: Push

Posted by Liz on Feb 13, 2012 in aging, exercise, Inspiration | 9 comments

It’s no secret that an important trend on Flashfree has been physical activity and healthy habits. Some of that is personal:  I am an exercise junkie and I believe (and studies continue to demonstrate) that it physical activity is an important key to emotional and overall wellbeing. It has also been shown to  improve your sex life  and help preserve bone density as you grow older, especially if you are a woman. Moreover, it takes two — diet AND exercise — to insure that your metabolism keeps pace with the rest of your life. Sure, you’ve heard it all before. And I can hear you telling yourself that you really try to get to the gym or out for a walk but somehow [fill in the blank] keeps getting in the way.

Psssst. Hey you! I want to share a gift with you:

Motivating women

All three  of these women are in their 40s, which I love because it helps me practice what I preach — that the future, your future  — is now. It’s going to creep up on you before you know it and suddenly, those 40s turn into 50s and the bones are getting brittler and the metabolism is slowing, fat is redistributing into areas that you never knew existed and somehow, maintaining what you have is a lot more difficult. Throw in hormonal havoc and wow! Trust me on this one; I’m living it. And if you are in your 30s and happen upon this post (and this series), please read it. Yes, you – 30 something year-old – because if you need some motivation, if you waiting for that push, I’ve got it for you.

I’ve known Shonali Burke for several years now. She’s a powerhouse in business and a gorgeous woman inside and out. I started seeing posts on Facebook that she was bootcamping (my word, not hers’) and I took note because this beautiful woman was shining in ways that I had not observed previously. An anomaly? Apparently not, because several other gorgeous, talented powerhouse women were likewise, taking on the world (and their bodies) one day at a time, including my friends Kami Watson Huyse and Julie Pippert.

So I approached them, wondering why this trend appeared to be taking hold, especially among women of a certain age group.  And I believe that what they shared with me may help you to step back and try. Or try again.

Push

Kami says that while she used to be in great shape, having three kids and starting a business meant putting her own needs aside, “after a particularly hectic and stressful 2011,” She explains, “I decided it was time to make the time. Plus, I was starting to notice other signs of decline, a knee that hurts most of the time, a back that went out twice last year, and general levels of stress that topped my normal manic pace.” Never one to go down without a fight, Shonali shares that “as I grew older, the pounds crept on and I fell into the mindset of ‘well, this is just part of growing older,’ and accepted it, though I didn’t really like the way I looked or felt inside.” She adds that she noticed a friend’s Facebook post about starting a new regimen and figured “why not me too?” “Why not,” she says, adding that she’s “spent the last several years focusing on the health and wellbeing of various family members and not [her] own; it’s time to make my health a priority.”

Stress and babies and weight are fantastic motivators. So is life. Julie also explains that she “lost her health in a big way” as the result of a complicated pregnancy and an illness, started having thyroid issues, lost her home base and her ability to work and her health. Coupled with the loss of a friend to cancer, she says that “my mortality hit me like a ton of bricks” and that “I wanted my health, my energy, my figure and my self-respect back. I wanted to live and have a good quality of life.”

Giving that body the boot

Can accountability help? It appears that it can. And so can convenience.  Shonali works out twice a week with Maryland-based trainer Grant Hill who practices “bootcamp inspired personal training” and says that her husband recently joined her.” She explains “what I particularly love about Grant’s approach is that he comes to my neighborhood and we work out at a local nearby park. I just LOVE this,” she exclaims, “it’s great to exercise outdoors, even in the cold, rain and snow.” Each session lasts 45 to 50 minutes and entails total body conditioning circuits. And when she doesn’t work out with Grant, she says that she either goes for an hour-long walk in her neighborhood, incorporating lunges into her walks, or uses an elliptical at home for at least 25 to 30 minutes. Kami says that she’s also enrolled in a Boot Camp program, and will be participating it in everyday. “I knew [that] I needed accountability, and since I have been in the habit of exercise before (she ran marathons in her 20s and 30s), I know it takes getting into that groove.”

However, if boot camp isn’t your thing, perhaps an individualized program (with a little help from an at-home trainer) resonates better. Julie says that she started with walking, especially when she moved from New England (where she says she just naturally moved more) to Texas (where, for landscape and weather changes) meant that she had to be more deliberate in her efforts. Eventually, she added jogging, hand weights and other ‘switch ups,’ and when she felt she had hit the wall, got busier and found herself bored with her routine, she “started doing Denise Austin Wake Up and Go workouts.” Compared to walking and jogging, she’s “noticing much better results, adding that “overall, my energy is up so I’m likely to jump up to do something than feel too tired to move.”

Get into the groove

For each of these women, self realization and routines are rote and part and parcel of their lives. But they are also the motivators that have helped them push themselves to make a commitment towards healthier lifestyles. It’s strange how life sometimes delivers a message over and over again. But nothing changes until we are willing to listen and get into our grooves to create new patterns that work for us.

Change is never ‘one size fits all.’ The overriding theme in these changes however, is that it’s never too late to get back on the horse.

On Wednesday, I’ll share how physical activity coupled with dietary changes has led to some incredible personal outcomes.

Meanwhile, tell me what pushes you? Have you recently made similar changes in your life?

Wednesday Bubble: How pink is your…

Posted by Liz on Feb 8, 2012 in aging, appearance, menopause | 4 comments

Bet ya thought this was a post about the Komen/Planned Parenthood debacle. Actually, it’s about pink. Labia pink (did you know that someone has actually invented that colour? I did you not!) But I digress, because it’s Wednesday and time to re-burst this particular bubble. So, I ask you: are your labia feeling their age? Do they need a bit more pink? There’s an app for that. Literally.

‘My New Pink Button’ , a genital cosmetic colorant, will help restore your labia to their naturally ‘youthful’ pink color! Feeling a bit more daring?  There’s a color for that too! Purple, bright red, amber, you name it. Any shade that you’ve ever dreamt of. Any hue that your partner desires. After all, if you’re going to dye your hair, why not dye down there?

While you’re at it, you can also reshape your labia to insure that they are more desirable in appearance. Vaginal rejuvenation, writes journalist Angel Bonvoglia for the Women’s Media Center Blog, is a procedure where cosmetic surgeons (mostly men), “carve, burn, cauterize, and stitch the female labia, clitoral environs, vaginal canal, and other points south… in order to create supposedly longed for “designer” vaginas and thereby “enhance sexual gratification.”” Ironically, Bonovoglia discovers that  labiaplasty, the most popular procedure (which entails either leaving just the edge of the inner labia or cutting it off entirely) actually impairs sexual desire. Still, even a top surgeon is quoted as claiming that a tight vagina will keep any man around.

Granted, we live in a visual culture, where middle age is synonymous with invisibility and where older women reach a point where they virtually cease to exist. Women poke, pull, botox, dye, suck, lift and pout in an attempt to hold on to their visibility. Now they have the option to make sure that all is well down below as well, which when taken to extremes, also insures that they rob themselves of the very thing that they are trying to regain: their sexuality.

Why do we need to be worried about or spare our partners from discovering discolored or loose labia? (Really, if he or she is down there, are their eyes open?) Better yet, have our attempts to regain our sexuality insured that we have lost our sanity at the same time?

What do you think? What flava would you like your labia?

Wednesday Bubble: Yes, you can!

Posted by Liz on Feb 1, 2012 in aging, Inspiration | 6 comments

If you are anything like me, you may not always think you can, even though you are capable, smart and talented. And as women, we often find ourselves questioning our abilities (even though we are capable, smart and talented). For example, when was the last time you asked for a salary increase? Or defended yourself against a bully? Or took the bull by the horns and made that change that you’ve been telling yourself that you are going to make for a zillion months? Well? When?

No worries, because I’m not going to go all kumbaya on you. It’s not my style. But I would like to share my own ‘yes, you can’ moment, in hopes that it might motivate at least one person to take the first step they’ve been procrastinating about taking.

Let’s talk about taking the bull by the horns, aka, there’s no time like the present. First, a bit of context.

The last quarter of 2011 was a trying time for me. Business issues became all consuming, I was traveling a lot, sleeping a little, drinking too much and had swayed from diet. All of which add up to zero. And by the end of this time, I ended up a few pounds heavier, exhausted and truly out of balance. Not a great way to start a new year. And hence, my body revolted, forcing me not only to slow down but to stop entirely; I contracted a viral infection of the inner ear that resulted in terrible vertigo. And if you have ever had vertigo, you know that it ain’t pretty. Or fun.

This year, I have made a few promises to myself, mostly, to shed those couple of pounds that are hanging on, improve my eating habits and try the hardest to stay balanced. The latter part of this does not necessarily jive with my A type personality but so far it’s working. But more importantly? Yesterday I challenged myself to run a 10k at the gym. And I completed it in a fairly good time. Although once an avid runner, I have not run any admirable distance in decades. And it felt really good, AND dragged me out of the January doldrums.  Mostly though? I realized that I can; I can get back into a healthy groove, maintain some calm, rethink where I am in my life right now and if it’s where I want to be. And if not, I can define what’s next on the horizon and work towards making it happen. Because, I can kick it. I can run a 10K if I feel like it.

Guess what?  So can you.

Promise me that the next time that little voice in your head starts to talk you out of taking a step, even it’s a baby step, that you’ll pause and tell yourself “yes, I can.” And then just try…cuz:

Before this did you really know what life was,
Comprehend to the track for its wide cos,
Gettin mentions on the tip of the vibe buzz,
Rock ‘n’ roll to the beat of the funk fuzz,
Wipe your feet really good on the rhythm rug,
If you feel the urge to freak do the jitter bug,
Come and spread your arms if you really need a hug…

[Lyrics: A Tribe Called Quest]

Kumbaya? Maybe a wee little bit. Wednesday? No bubble this week. Just a little inspiration and whole lot of admiration..

Kick it.

All the rage…menopausal women

Posted by Liz on Jan 13, 2012 in aging, humour, menopause | 0 comments

I had hoped to go for the chocolate trifecta this week. But this video reminded me that I need to devote more time to laughing and less to the clinical side of this transition. While this is definitely a repost, it’s too good to pass up .

Happy Friday and Happy Weekend. Enjoy!