Posts Tagged "Inspiration"

What woman has changed your world…or hers’?

Posted by Liz on Mar 2, 2012 in Inspiration, women's health | 3 comments

[Credit: Chau Doan/ Oxfam America]

When it comes to advocacy, I’ve got soft spot in my heart for women. That’s why I’ve spent at least three days a week since 2008 advocating for women’s health, for women to take care of themselves and for women to take care of one another. So, when a friend asked me if I would help support Oxfam America’s International Women’s Day campaign, I couldn’t say no.

This year, Oxfam America is hoping that you will help them honor women who have made a difference in your community. Or in your life…simply because women become stronger and more resilient when we support one another.

According to recent statistics:

• 66% of the world’s work is done by women and yet they earn only 10% of the world’s income
• The majority of the earth’s population that are living in poverty (more than 2.5 billion people in total) and surviving on less than $2 a day are women and girls

Time and again, I’ve written about how the foundation for the health and wellbeing starts and ends with social support. Indeed, research has shown that women’s innate ability to nurture and nourish ties, coupled with overall satisfaction with work significantly predicts wellbeing especially during midlife and over the menopausal transition. It may even affect how long we live. Nowhere is this more important than in the communities where we reside because as much as many of us complain about how busy we are, there is a deep, soul stroking satisfaction in taking a moment to pause, acknowledge and help one another.

Consequently, this week and next, I am challenging you to think about the woman (or women) in your life that has changed your world? Or hers’. And, encouraging you toTo support Oxfam America’s goal to end world hunger and empower women through their GROW campaign. Women are hungry and to combat that hunger. Oxfam’s GROW campaign urges all of us to make smarter investments in small-scale farmers, especially women, whose efforts can help find sustainable solutions to hunger. Women like my oldest and dearest friend, Susan Ujcic, co-founder and co-owner of Helsing Junction Farm in Olympia, Washington.

This isn’t about money; it’s about gestures, such as:

• Sending an International Women’s Day eCard to a woman you know, to say thank you for all that she does. Better yet, send it to several women who’ve made the world a better place.
• Giving the Oxfam America International Women’s Day 2012 award to a woman you think has made a difference to the world. She could be a teacher, your mom, a non-profit leader, a woman entrepreneur, the neighbor who always checks up on you when you’re ill… the possibilities are endless.
• Joining Oxfam’s Sisters on the Planet initiative.

One email, one award, one woman at a time. Imagine the difference a simple gesture can make.

Wednesday Bubble: Yes, you can!

Posted by Liz on Feb 1, 2012 in aging, Inspiration | 6 comments

If you are anything like me, you may not always think you can, even though you are capable, smart and talented. And as women, we often find ourselves questioning our abilities (even though we are capable, smart and talented). For example, when was the last time you asked for a salary increase? Or defended yourself against a bully? Or took the bull by the horns and made that change that you’ve been telling yourself that you are going to make for a zillion months? Well? When?

No worries, because I’m not going to go all kumbaya on you. It’s not my style. But I would like to share my own ‘yes, you can’ moment, in hopes that it might motivate at least one person to take the first step they’ve been procrastinating about taking.

Let’s talk about taking the bull by the horns, aka, there’s no time like the present. First, a bit of context.

The last quarter of 2011 was a trying time for me. Business issues became all consuming, I was traveling a lot, sleeping a little, drinking too much and had swayed from diet. All of which add up to zero. And by the end of this time, I ended up a few pounds heavier, exhausted and truly out of balance. Not a great way to start a new year. And hence, my body revolted, forcing me not only to slow down but to stop entirely; I contracted a viral infection of the inner ear that resulted in terrible vertigo. And if you have ever had vertigo, you know that it ain’t pretty. Or fun.

This year, I have made a few promises to myself, mostly, to shed those couple of pounds that are hanging on, improve my eating habits and try the hardest to stay balanced. The latter part of this does not necessarily jive with my A type personality but so far it’s working. But more importantly? Yesterday I challenged myself to run a 10k at the gym. And I completed it in a fairly good time. Although once an avid runner, I have not run any admirable distance in decades. And it felt really good, AND dragged me out of the January doldrums.  Mostly though? I realized that I can; I can get back into a healthy groove, maintain some calm, rethink where I am in my life right now and if it’s where I want to be. And if not, I can define what’s next on the horizon and work towards making it happen. Because, I can kick it. I can run a 10K if I feel like it.

Guess what?  So can you.

Promise me that the next time that little voice in your head starts to talk you out of taking a step, even it’s a baby step, that you’ll pause and tell yourself “yes, I can.” And then just try…cuz:

Before this did you really know what life was,
Comprehend to the track for its wide cos,
Gettin mentions on the tip of the vibe buzz,
Rock ‘n’ roll to the beat of the funk fuzz,
Wipe your feet really good on the rhythm rug,
If you feel the urge to freak do the jitter bug,
Come and spread your arms if you really need a hug…

[Lyrics: A Tribe Called Quest]

Kumbaya? Maybe a wee little bit. Wednesday? No bubble this week. Just a little inspiration and whole lot of admiration..

Kick it.

Finish Line for the Big-M Was in Sight. Guest post by Sarah Bowen Shea

Posted by Liz on Jul 25, 2011 in Early menopause | 4 comments

When writer/author Sarah Bowen Shea first pinged me on Twitter about her post, I was a bit skeptical. I had never had a conversation with her nor had she ever been on my radar. And let’s face it; I get a lot of daily solicitations because of Flashfree and my interest in menopause. However, when I clicked on the link, I discovered that not only did I love her writing, but that I loved her post. Moreover, a lot of you have been asking for posts on early menopause. 

I hope that you’ll show Sarah some love after reading this post and head over to her blog, Another Mother Runner and check it out; if you are interested in running, you may find some gems lurking  in the lines!

Despite being the one behind our sometimes-outrageous TMI Tuesday status updates (hotel sex, anyone?) on our Facebook page and writing the chapter in The Book about peeing, pooping, passing gas, and periods, I’m hesitant to pen this post. It’s about…menopause. My top three excuses? 1. My mom never had “The Talk” with me, so I’ve never been fully comfortable talking about, ahem, menstruation (or lack thereof). 2. There isn’t enough good slang for menopause (let’s rectify that, ladies!). 3. I am not 100% comfortable with being 45 years old…and getting dogged with early onset menopause. (There, I typed it. A first step, right?)

But I’ve decided to broach the topic because several fans have told us they wish we’d talk about it. Here goes: I’ve suspected for several years that early onset menopause  might be coming my way because I had secondary infertility due to elevated FSH (follicle stimulating hormone) levels. My doc said the two aren’t necessarily linked but they often are. Always a glass-half-full kinda gal, I didn’t dwell or worry—until last summer, when I started bleeding like crazy. If I’d gone swimming in shark-infested waters, I would have been fish-food: Heavy bleeding for a week, then 10 days off, then another heavier-and-longer period, then an 8-day reprieve, then another bleeding session…you get the bloody (literally) picture. Never one to rush in for medical advice, I merely grumbled, contemplated buying stock in Playtex, and fared forward until a good running friend urged me to see my OB/GYN. The doc did some bloodwork and said nothing was wrong except that, well, lookie there, my hormone levels showed I was already in menopause. (Gulp!) But she said menopause was a slippery thing: The real marker was absence of a period for one year.

Is Flashfree for me?

Posted by Liz on Nov 19, 2010 in Inspiration, women's health | 0 comments

There’s a misconception going around that only women who are entering or have entered menopause should read this blog. And it’s not true. So, I thought that I’d use this opportunity to highlight some of the common themes and issues that run through an adult woman’s life, no matter her age:

• Health. Women’s health is so important. And so misunderstood. While some of that misunderstanding can be attributed to an early failure to evaluate drugs in important studies, for example, heart disease, the broader issue is that women are intricately wired beings whose systems are truly integrated and connected. Our physical health is so often influenced by our emotions and environment that it can be difficult to discern cause and effect,  and by default, treat appropriately and effectively. However, there are important steps that can be taken to stave off some of the unwanted effects of aging or even some diseases. Just think…exercise and heart health, bone health, mind health; a healthy diet and maintaining a healthy weight and helping prevent heart disease and diabetes; or, stress reduction, yoga, focused breathing to maintain balance and energy and promote immune health.

• Friendships and Networks. No matter our age, situation, relationship status, creed, religion, or color we rely on our relationships and networks to raise us up and bring us out of the darkness into the light, to fully blossom, thrive and grow, to create, express and love. Just think…strengthening friendships and support networks to maintain emotional and physical health or boosting self esteem to help with career and achievement

My point is that if you are in your late 30s or 40s and premenopausal, there are many things you can do now that will benefit you later. And many of these tips are addressed within the archives of this blog.

So,is Flashfree just for menopausal set?

Nope. Flashfree is for you. And although many posts focus on menopause, there is often a subtext of lessons that can be learned from and followed early rather than later.

Join me on the journey…won’t you?

Wednesday Bubble: Good Girls & Inner Hags – A Woman’s Journey to the Self by Amy Palko

Posted by Liz on Nov 17, 2010 in Inspiration | 7 comments

I  first discovered the gorgeous Amy Palko on Twitter. And it was not too long before we began to exchange quips. Then, I had the privilege of meeting Amy at a small pub last year on her home turf and I knew that Amy was an inspiration to women, an artistic, creative lovely soul with a purpose, a connector, supporter and a goddess in her own right. Thank you Amy, for sharing ways that women can love their entire selves and discover their inner goddess.

At the start of this year, I took a risk.  I did something that perhaps only a few short months before, I wouldn’t have dreamed of doing.  I bought a ticket for the overnight train to London, and booked myself a place on Vena Ramphal’s workshop Tearing Up the Good Girl Script.

Because, you see, I have always tried to be that good girl.  It was always my endeavour to find a way of being myself in such a way that I would stay acceptable, attractive even, to those that I met.  I have always tried to ensure that my femininity was primped, polished & painted.

I was attempting to tame the untameable – and I was exhausted with trying.

It was the realization that I was engaged in a futile attempt that led me to London.  When I arrived at the venue, my feet frozen were numb from the cold, and my eyes were heavy from lack of sleep on the crowded carriage.  My body felt slow and sleepy, my mind was dulled, my senses sluggish.  I had shut down.  My soul had closed itself up tight like one of those frosted rosebuds I’d just seen in Regent’s Park.

Because we atrophy when we try to craft ourselves into some cultural ideal of femininity.  Like the Classical Greek and Roman sculptures of the female form with their smooth limbs, their passive smiles, we render ourselves impermeable, fixed, numb.  A beautiful, cold surface with none of the wonder of womanhood.  None of the earthy, creative, sumptuous feminine spirit that makes us feel whole, grounded, conscious, and alive.

During the workshop, Vena asked us the question, “Where in your life are you trying to be good instead of being happy?”  And I was struck with the realization that it was in every area of my life.  Every single aspect of my life had become a carefully choreographed gender performance of what I knew others found acceptable, manageable, approachable, feminine.

As my northbound train left the station Vena’s question still echoed through my consciousness.  And I no longer felt slow or sleepy, dull or sluggish.  Instead I felt a bit raw, a bit tender, and maybe even just a bit vulnerable.  Just a little bit.  A chink in my carefully constructed veneer now scored the patina of pleasantness and passivity… and it felt good.  I felt alive.

Now it is the end of the year.  A year when I learned to say no.  When I learned to reveal those parts of me that aren’t nice but are authentic and true.  When I learned that revealing those parts, that side of me which I had always assumed was not acceptable, actually made me more, not less.  More of a woman, more of myself.  Me in the raw.

So, it is perhaps unsurprising that 11 months on I find myself reading Emma Restall Orr’s book Kissing the Hag: The Dark Goddess and the Unacceptable Nature of Women.  It seems fitting – almost a way of bracketing my experience of 2010.

As I turn the pages I am reminded of my awakening, my tearing up of my good girl script, and I know my journey is just beginning.  I still have lessons to learn in embracing my inner hag – that dark goddess that resides in us all and who refuses to be plastered in cosmetics, refuses to be aestheticized.

As Emma Restall Orr says so evocatively, “womankind is not often sunlight upon soft ripples, spring dew upon petals, the smiling and gentle ease of mothering comfort; grace, silence and obedience are not qualities that the average woman can sustain for any length of time.  Sugar and spice and all things nice isn’t the whole recipe: we too have snips of string and apple cores, bugs and slugs, tails, snouts, conkers, splinters and mud in the mix.  Gloriously, it is not our failings but our very nature that is constituted of black clouds, cacophony, sudden storms and wild, treacherous mire.  Here, in the muddy, bloody, raw essence of woman, we glimpse the face of the hag, the pith and fibre of woman that is just not nice.”

My good girl script is torn to shreds and my inner hag dares to show her face, her heart and her soul.

Is yours?

About the author…Amy Palko is a writer, photographer, academic, teacher, spiritual seeker, home-educating mother of 3.  She plays many roles in life, but the thread that runs through each is the sacred feminine.