Posts by Liz

Creativity and the menopause

Posted by Liz on May 9, 2011 in Inspiration | 1 comment

I happened upon a tweet by my friend Amy Palko over the weekend:

“What effect does menopause have on our perception of ourselves as intrinsically creative beings?”

For those of you who don’t know Amy, she is a writer, educator and creator of a wonderful site called Bloom by Moon, where she explores the moon cycles and the goddess narratives in order to help women reconnect with their sacred feminine. Those of you who are regular readers of this blog may recall that Amy graced the pages of Flashfree last year and contributed a beautiful piece on acknowledging our inner dark goddesses, a piece that remains close to my heart.

So, back to Amy’s question on creativity and menopause.

Menopause, as those of you who are in the throes, are swirling around the “peri” or fully past it know, is time of great change, not only in women’s reproductive systems but also in their lives. Although Western society in particular uses menopause as an overall characterization of an aging woman, it actually goes much deeper than surface and physical changes. In fact, it is possible that the emotional changes that coincide with the transition may be what fuels creativity, particularly as a woman moves deeper into her life and her ‘self.’

Consider that creativity is not an easily defined construct, nor does does it manifest the same in everyone. Just like menopause.

Consequently, perhaps we should change the paradigm, shake up the system, shake up our systems, our beliefs, our viewpoints and our “selves.” Isn’t it time to view the transition the start of the second half of a life’s journey, where the lines that have been etched over the time period leading up to menopause become more jagged, looser and flexible, and where women finally start to allow themselves to “be” who they are rather than who and how others define them? Is it possible that menopause is an opportunity to expand how women view the world and their roles as opposed to shrinking into a self-imposed myopic state of nothing? Can hormone-driven mood swings and depression be spun into threads of passion, ink on paper, colours on a canvas, wherever and whenever the creative impulse strikes? Can we take the anger we feel as parts our bodies betray us and use that anger to fight harder for better, less dangerous menopausal remedies?

As I said, creativity takes many forms.

The opportunities are endless.

I am literally standing on the precipice of age 50 and swirling in the ‘peri’ of the menopause. I have made a promise to myself to take the reins and to stop asking for permission. I am ready to control as much of my journey as I can. My creativity may ebb and flow but at the end of the day, I’d like to believe that it is what I will use to guide the rest of my life’s journey.

You too, have a creative self and a creative soul just ready to emerge. What is it telling you? Moreover, when are you going to take charge of it and allow it unleash its beauty on the world?

Let it out. There really is no other choice.

Menopause: outlook and outcomes. Is it you? Or them?

Posted by Liz on May 6, 2011 in appearance, hot flash, menopause | 2 comments

When you start flashing and sweating, the whole world, especially the world under the age of 45, is watching and judging, right?

Not so fast. In fact, what I think you think, may not be what you think at all. In other words,  personal attitudes about menopause and its symptoms could be shaping how well or poorly it’s experienced. And this experience may be based in beliefs, moods and perceptions, not reality.

According to research, many women say that menopause makes them feel “stupid, embarrassed, incompetant, unattractive, etc.”

However, more importantly, these women believe that others have the same thoughts about them, which researchers say are likely to influence the types of strategies women use to manage their symptoms, strategies that range from “keeping up appearances” to avoiding social situations altogether.

When I read this, I started to wonder if menopausal women are actually stacking the deck against themselves and contributing to societal attitudes about aging and menopause. What’s more, do women misperceive how younger adults feel when they start flashing around them?

To answer these questions, researchers polled 290 young men and women between the ages of 25 and 45. Almost two thirds were female. The questionnaire was geared towards answer the following:

• How are hot flash symptoms, namely redness and sweating, perceived when they occur?
• What types of beliefs exist around menopause?
• Is there any relationship between age, gender and perception about menopause?

Importantly, over half of those polled attributed a red face to emotions, e.g., embarrassment, anger or stress. However, while younger women tended to attribute redness to an increase in body temperature, younger men tended to believe that redness was related to physical exertion. Similar responses were provided for sweating, with women attributing sweating to a health problem and men, to environmental temperature. Hormonal factors and menopause were reported by less than half (41%) of men and women polled.

Also important was the fact that overwhelmingly, both men and women indicated that they felt empathy or neutral about symptoms and not at all uncomfortable, and almost all (97%) would inquire if a woman was feeling well or ill.

These responses truly suggest that menopausal women tend to overestimate the extent to which others are able to judge their menopausal status. Moreover, young men and women tend to empathize and show concern and compassion, emotions that are inconsistent with expectations that others will react negatively to a public hot flash or associated redness. Even more important, age did not appear to influence general beliefs about menopause, which researchers suggest implies that “the experience of menopause, or seeking information about menopause in mid life, might lead to more neutral or positive beliefs.”

So, what does this all mean? Granted, the sample in this study was primarily female and self selecting, meaning that they chose to participate or not. Therefore, it is possible that these findings do not accurately reflect the views of a broader population, especially men. However, the researchers do point out that they attempted to find participants from a variety of occupations that were more specific to setting where women might report a higher degree of social embarassment.

Nevertheless, what these findings do suggest is that real life might actually contradict how women feel others feel about their menopause, and that reactions might actually be tempered or non-existant in social settings. This should encourage a broader population of menopausal women to overcome their fear of embarrassment or to no longer resign themselves to “coping” but rather, empower them to take charge.  On a larger level, they also show that there’s a need to step up and negate stimatizing or negative views of menopause, even amongst ourselves. This can be achieved through sharing of experiences, not only with similarly aged women but also, with younger women and men who can gain a lot of life experience at a considerably younger age.

The next time you start flashing in public and looking around to see who’s staring, just remember that it may be you, not them. And your ‘tude will truly rule the day (and those flashes), if you let it.

Wednesday Bubble: I’m a Hot Momma!

Posted by Liz on May 4, 2011 in Inspiration | 2 comments

What?!! A Hot Momma? I’m not a momma!

However, I am a proud finalist in the Hot Momma’s Project 2011 Case Study Competition. So the only bubble I’m bursting this week is the one that send messages to young women that they can’t excel where and how they want to.

The Hot Momma’s Project, founded by the incredible Kathy Korman Frey, is a self-described,” award-winning women’s leadership research venture housed at the George Washington University School of Business, Center for Entrepreneurial Excellence.” By exposing women and girls to online mentors and role models, The Hot Momma’s Project helps to “increase self efficacy” and open career opportunities. Indeed, research has shown that Frey’s model works, boosting self-confidence in women ages 18 and over by as much as 100% to 220%! Moreover, last January, the venture became the became the world’s largest women’s ‘teachable stories’ library, providing global access to stories of female role models and mentors, free of charge.

When I was growing up, my role models were the strong women in my family. My mother returned to education to get her MLS when I was in grammer school and went on to run one of the most esteemed corporate business libraries in NYC. My grandmother, who never received a college degree, was instrumental in leading and rallying women in her local community during WWII. I am fortunate that I had such great mentors to show me that women could excel and lead in roles traditionally owned by men.

There are many amazing women involved in the Hot Momma’s Project and I am thrilled to be part of it. I hope that you’ll read through each of the winning cases and share them with the young women in your life who are searching for direction. And if you would like to read more about my story, you can find it here.

I’ve said it before and I will say it again. If my work or contribution inspires one person a day, I am successful. I hope that every young woman across the globe can discover the journey that fulfills her passions as much as mine has.

Calcium, vitamin D and heart disease. What’s the 4-11?

Posted by Liz on May 2, 2011 in bone health, heart disease | 5 comments

“Calcium supplements cause heart attacks in postmenopausal women.”

Whoa! What?!

If you saw the headlines last week, you may be wondering what’s up with calcium supplementation. Afterall, don’t medical professionals advise the use of supplements to stave off bone loss associated with osteoporosis? And as a result, the Centers for Disease Control reports that over 50% of adults currently use calcium supplements and more than 60% of women over age 60.

It’s important to get away from the sensational headline and take a closer look at what the research shows and what you need to know.

Previous studies have suggested that there may be a link between use of calcium supplements (without vitamin D) and heart attack; in fact, as Reuters‘ reported last year, calcium supplements were shown to increase the risk of heart attack by as much as 31%, possibly as a result of plaque formation in blood vessels. However, is the risk the same if calcium is used alone versus if it is used in conjunction with vitamin D?  In the Women’s Health Initiative study, the use of calcium and vitamin D did not appear to influence heart disease risk at all.

However, researchers decided to take another look at the data because they say that in this trial, more than half of participants were taking ‘personal calcium’ (i.e. not regulated or standardized to all trial participants) and almost half were also adding Vitamin D.

In this reanalysis, published just last week in the British Medical Journal, the researchers discounted the women who were characterized as personal users of calcium supplements and instead, limited their evaluation to a group of women who were not using personal calcium supplements at the study’s start and previously unpublished data from the trial. The findings? The use of calcium with or without vitamin D appeared to cause a 25% to 30% increase in the risk for heart attack and a 15% to 20% increased risk for stroke. However, the researchers say that even small increases in the incidence in heart disease may manifest substantially, especially in the elderly. They add that if you take a look at the risk-benefit ratio, it is unfavourable, meaning that taking calcium with or without vitamin D for five years would cause twice as many heart attacks or strokes than then numbers of fractures that would be prevented.  Additionally, the data analysis suggests that dosing is not a factor, and that the total amount of calcium taken daily is less important than the abrupt changes in blood calcium levels immediately following supplementation.

Although this research answers a few questions about potential risks about calcium supplementation, it also leaves a key question unanswered:  how does the addition of magnesium and vitamin K, which are often included in commercially-available calcium supplements, affect these findings? Data suggest that these minerals and vitamins are added to keep calcium in the bones where it belongs and out the arteries where it does not.

The best guideline, as always, is to visit a physician to assess your bone health and come up with a plan that works specifically for you. Although calcium supplementation appears to be risky, more data are needed before leading organizations start to change their tune about calcium and bone health. Meanwhile, stay ahead of the headlines and try to focus on increasing the amount of calcium-rich foods in your diet:

* DV = Daily Value. DVs were developed by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration to help consumers compare the nutrient contents among products within the context of a total daily diet. The DV for calcium is 1,000 mg for adults and children aged 4 years and older. Foods providing 20% of more of the DV are considered to be high sources of a nutrient, but foods providing lower percentages of the DV also contribute to a healthful diet. The U.S. Department of Agriculture’s Nutrient Database Web site lists the nutrient content of many foods. It also provides a comprehensive list of foods containing calcium.
** Calcium content varies slightly by fat content; the more fat, the less calcium the food contains.
*** Calcium content is for tofu processed with a calcium salt. Tofu processed with other salts does not provide significant amounts of calcium.

Cancer…it’s still personal

Posted by Liz on Apr 28, 2011 in breast cancer, emotions, Inspiration | 20 comments

Two years ago, I wrote a post about breast cancer and the fact that it was personal. Very personal. I want to share a portion of that post today and also add a few thoughts. The reason? It’s personal. Again.

Location: Department Store dressing room stall. Circa: late 1960s, early 1970s.

The characters: Me and my mom.

Scene: She is covering herself as she removes her shirt. I notice the scars. Lots of scars….to the side of one breast. I meet her eyes and she meets mine. Then I learn what the term ‘ breast cancer’ means.

My mother was diagnosed with breast cancer when she was 30. Thirty. Even today, less than half of women under the age of 40 are likely to develop breast cancer and the majority of cases are diagnosed after the age of 50. So, imagine the shock. What’s more, imagine the time. 1960… when breast cancer awareness wasn’t at the fore and people didn’t discuss it, when breasts and surrounding muscle were literally hacked off rather than carefully removing the tumor with clean margins, when many men left their wives after they became disfigured.

My dad didn’t leave. And my brother learned about it through a ‘friend’ in school who was teasing him.

I’ve spoken to my mother about her cancer, about the fear of it returning, and about how she feels about not being able to wear sleeveless tops or strengthen/firm those muscles even though she has exercised regularly her entire life. How she felt when my brother came home from school and asked her about it. How she feels now when a friend is diagnosed with cancer. Her answer is always pretty much the same.

But cancer can return. And even though this time it’s not in her breast, it looks like she’s may go down that road…again. And my heart is breaking. Because the fear in the tone of her voice says more than any words can.

She is afraid.

I don’t blame her. I would be afraid too.

Only this time? She’s 80, not 30 and although she’s tough as nails and very, very active, cancer has an insidious nature, sometimes too insidious. And even though in my heart of hearts I believe that she will be fine, I still feel awful about it.

In the past two years, I’ve had two friends who’ve been diagnosed with breast cancer, not for the first but second time. Recently, another close friend developed a very rare form of cancer and despite its severity, emerged in one piece and better than ever. Others in my life are four-, five-time survivors. Hell, even my dad has had bladder cancer since the early 90s. People survive. People move on with their lives. And yet sometimes, we lose people that we love.

Although it may be too early for a Mother’s Day post, it’s never too late to let someone know how you feel about them.

So Mom?

Thank you. The relationship has been a difficult one for most of our lives, threatened by personality and character and actions and words. Often, this road has not been an easy one. But you brought me into this life and I want you to know that despite all, the forks we’ve taken to get to this place have converged and our road is paved with mutual love and respect. I. Love. You. That is all.

And the cancer, I am not certain of the outcome this time. But I am certain of one thing: a mother’s love, and my mother’s love, is one of the most important gifts.

This one’s close to the bone. It’s close to my heart. It’s personal.